geekyViruses you suffer from:
Pokemon (181%)
Pikachu! Use your hyper-electric-get-a-life move now!
Linux (100%)
Install the latest version of Microsoft Windows. Learn to love it.
USA (100%)
Rule, Britannia! Britannia rules the waves. [repeat]
Junkfood (115%)
Eat some real food. Something which you can identify the source of every ingredient, not the point of manufacture.
Sci-fi (270%)
Stop wearing the stick-on ears.
Cthulhu (130%)
Read some Enid Blyton.
Goth (155%)
Grow up. Let your roots grow out. Listen to Britney.
Gaming (130%)
Life is not a game. Roll 3D6. On a 4 or more go out and do something with your life.
BBCB (140%)
CTRL-Break, and get a real computer. Repeat: "Mode 7 was not a good thing."
Religion (180%)
Read "God's Debris" by Scott Adams (yes, the Dilbert guy)
8-Bit (160%)
Polygons, all the polygons you can get are not enough.
British (190%)
No need for cure. Benign virus.
Japan (115%)
Big is good. Small is bad. Giant robots would not make a good last line of defence for Earth.
Discordia (170%)
Buy a suit. Invest your money. Eat hotdog buns on a friday.
Windows (100%)
Try MacOS X. It's based on UNIX, it has a smoother UI than Windows and it doesn't suck.
As an extra feature the boxes look nice.
Free BSD (130%)
The GPL isn't that bad really. Adopt a penguin at the zoo.
Politics (185%)
Stop caring!
Computer Games (140%)
Stop staring at the screen and get some fresh air. You should see a doctor about the RSI in your thumbs.
Conspiracy Theory (150%)
Face it, the elected government is in control. Actually that's quite scary.
Ultima (110%)
If you find one tell us.
Environmentalism (103%)
Consume more stuff! It's easier to buy new stuff than to recycle.
Viruses you might suffer from:
Amiga (80%)
Gnome is better than workbench. BEOS is better than Amiga OS. The TV Modulator was a pain in the arse and an EXTERNAL power pack? I ask you. And it didn't have a built in MIDI port like some of its rivals.
UNIX (90%)
Anything this old must be obselete. Go and install a nice modern operating system. I hear MSDOS has come a long way lately.
vi (90%)
Escape Meta Alt Control Shift.
Brand Names (75%)
Having a well-known name doesn't make it good.
Hippyism (93%)
Free love is passe and potentially dangerous, and patchouli smells like cat piss.
Macintosh (80%)
Use a mouse with more than one button.
Prog Rock (60%)
Long hair looks dumb with a bald spot. Listen to CD's they don't crackle.
Football (75%)
Do something unhealthy and indoors, away from the Bears.
Southampton (69%)
Move to the Isle of Wight.
